Life Notes From “On Becoming” -book by Toke Makinwa


I finally read the most talked about book by Toke Makinwa. I read it over the weekend and I was really surprised by my reaction to the book.

Prior to reading the book, I looked out for comments and people’s opinions but apparently some people didn’t think it was worth the price or even the hype. Others felt like it was one of the many strategies celebrities use to get attention.

But for me, it was enlightening. Not that it had anything in particular I had not heard about before. But I can say that I FINALLY understand the thought process of ladies that stay in abusive relationships (either physically or emotionally abusive relationships). I’ve once lost a dear friend because I tried too hard to convince her to leave her boyfriend. I knew she deserved better, and I just could not understand why she would not let go, despite all. Sadly, it didn’t end well between us at all.

Sometimes, you hear stories of what goes on in certain relationships and you ask “Was she stupid?” “What was she thinking?” “Was she blind?” This book made me realize how easy it is to judge others especially when we haven’t walked in their shoes. You think they deserve better, but they don’t think they do. They don’t even know their worth. A lot of girls out there are naïve and sometimes need to be told what to do especially by people who have made similar mistakes. We need more experienced women especially in Nigeria who will share their struggles and create a clearer path for the younger generation. Therefore I would recommend this book to all the young ladies out there. Read it, make fun of Toke’s silliness if you want to but be sure to learn from her mistakes.

3 points to take away from this book:

1. You will make lots of mistakes, but you have to rise up immediately, learn from it and move on and also make sure you never make that same mistake again. On several occasions before they got married, Toke left Maje. But somehow ended up going back. Now imagine if she learned her lesson 10 years ago???

2. Never under estimate the power of God in your life. Be consistent with Him: Every time she was deeply troubled, she would go to God and He always provided a way out for her. Her book is itself, a testimony of God’s goodness upon her life. In chapter 13. She said “I had been so set on marrying Maje that I never stopped to ask God if it was his will”. If we live our lives daily seeking the face of God and walking in line with his word, there will be no such regrets

3. You shouldn’t stop becoming: No one is perfect, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t make effort in being the best versions of ourselves. We all have our struggles, little as they may be, we should not ignore them.

As 2017 fast approaches, let’s all work towards becoming…I’m becoming FEARLESS…What are you becoming? Do share below. If you read all the way to this point! High five!!! Don’t forget to share your thoughts below.

Till my next post (which should be on Wednesday hopefully!)
Stay Blessed

  1. I’m still yet to read but i do have the PDF version or what, i hope i can read that soon. I commend her strength and drive now (‘now’ because i was never particular about her initially) but her being all up in my face (thanks to social media and internet) has shown me the go-getter/achiever in her which i love to identify with. I’m guessing this book will expose some more and i hope to get a thing or two from it personally.
    Way to go Dupe!

  2. I stopped at chapter 9 cos I downloaded the PDF free version loool. Even tho I haven’t finished, I just understood how hard it is to let go of someone you have already made up your mind on being with. But the painful truth is that, if it’s not God’s Will, it will never be as it should.
    UP baby girl

  3. Actually spent the better part of the beginning of the book getting angry. I was like seriously? Is she daft? Oh c’mon she fell for that again? Abeg which kain sweet mouth wey this Maje get na? Ah ah are there self esteem issues?
    But as I moved on and read how she was picking up the pieces and becoming, I started understanding the struggle.
    In the end? It was actually a great read.

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