So I was going to write a different post then this happened: He Proposed! and I said YES!
pay no attention to my nails plsss
I got lots of messages and calls from people, congratulating me which was pretty exciting. I also had people ask me “were you surprised”
Hmmmm….was I surprised?
We all know that congrats are in order when the proposal happens. When he goes down on one knee, proclaims his love for you and asks you to marry him and then slips the ring into your finger…but what if you don’t have a ring on that finger yet? Does that always mean you are not engaged?
I remember sometime back, Sola introduced me to a mentor as his wife-to-be and I think the mentor asked how preparations were going…or something like that. I was quick to reply “There’s no ring on my finger and Sola hasn’t proposed to me.” that was supposed to be a joke but a part of me meant it simply because I didn’t think it made any sense planning a wedding when he had not “officially proposed”
In other words “I did not think I was engaged”.
But now that I’m “officially engaged” It has occurred to me that I have actually been engaged for a while. LOOL. Maybe ours was another version of “engaged” that didn’t warrant an official question and a ring up until now. I think marriage is a choice and so is an engagement, it doesn’t have to be exactly how it is for other people. What matters is that there is an agreement and that both parties are happy. I remember someone telling me how he felt the world had labelled a lot of things, making it seem like they are the norm but at the end of the day, we all have different paths, labels shouldn’t define us nor should we feel pressured to conform to them. We are unique and so are our relationships and we should embrace that
Let me know your thoughts on this. At what point do you think a lady is engaged? Is it until the ring comes in? What if it never does? Will you refuse to get married without an “official proposal”?
And on a more exciting note, if you have wedding tips and trusted vendors, pleases share below. Thank you!!